So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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