Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
