even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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