He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I party with great urgency now.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize