she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I wish you could order shots online.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
