I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
