Everything about him screamed your future.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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