Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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