It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
