Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
