it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
