So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
