How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
it was like having sex with a tree stump
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Randomize