You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize