I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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