1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
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