Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
