the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
