Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
