I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize