well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
