Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
