yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
