so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
