Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize