Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?