I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
nutella sex= disaster
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
