Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
