found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
