I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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