Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
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