Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
