I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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