i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Randomize
