Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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