Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Randomize
Follow @tfln