Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
