It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Randomize
