remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
