Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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