dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
