who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize