i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
