I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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