Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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