So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Randomize
