You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
