I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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