i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
