love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
you inspire me to be a worse person
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Randomize
